Painting predictory

My father always tell me to stress less. Get it right. Try to chill out more. Don't burn yourself in both ends. I'll be thinking "Fuck you, man. You're old. Worry 'bout yer own life and i'll stir my shit myself. And at the same time. Yeah he's right. Thoughts are always contradictory. At least most of them, most of the time. I rarely feel that I can say something which I can't join in to the opposite of the saying. Just like life, Nirvana, God or whatever you want to call it.

Someone said that as soon as you say Nirvana is this, you capture it with a word and doesn't get the whole picture. So shut up asshole. Just be quiet and let come what may. Well I say fuck this as well. A monk that walks around all day thinking about getting is ass penetrated by a large pulsing dick, but forces himself to avoid sex never get it right. My belief is that you have to kick your game until it stabs you in the back and you can then learn something from it. Like the roman empire, the second world war or whatever hell we humans come up with. With the hindsight 2.0 we can see what fuckers we've been and make difference in the neverending future. The vast space of things that has not yet happened, but will in time. I'm thinking about the global warning, the unbalanced use and production of animals, the violence, my using of nicotine, my desires and the lust that keeps me going. Because the thing is that it is the same thing that keeps us going further.

This is a statement. For me it says: Fuck it and play the part. Be an asshole if you need to. Satisfy all your precious little made-up needs and you might actually learn from it. Right now I'm playing the part of the little cocky and fearless child, running arounf in the tivoli. But with a slightly sophisticated and well-mannered self consiousness which subtilizes the freudian origin of my actions. I'll frenzy around here inside until I'm sick of it - putting more logs onto the fire until it burns down and then be aware of what's rising from the ashes.

Please slap me in the face when I'm using you to fill up my inner emptiness.

Progression